I remember when ...

Looking back on annual visits to Buenos Aires since 1999, it's clear that the city and tango have changed a lot - some things for the better, others not so.

I remember when ...

... milongas were held in the iconic Maipu 444, the magnificent Club Espanol and the gorgeous Confiteria Ideal (pictured)

... garbage littered the footpath each night, pedestrians constantly had to dodge dog droppings, and Avenida 9 de Julio median strip was a no-go zone resembling a rubbish tip

... AU$1 would only buy 50 centavos, and it cost 5 pesos to enter a milonga

... La Viruta milonga (then known as La Estrella) attracted hot-shot milongueros.  Men wore jackets and ties to milongas, the standard of dance was high, and the milonga codes were strictly adhered to

... the only coffee available, including in the grand old confiterias, was not good at all

... Flabella was the go-to place for tango shoes

Now ...

... a number of the dance venues have closed - some converted into office space or gyms - but at least efforts are being made to renovate Confiteria Ideal

... the City of Buenos Aires has made a big effort to clean up and beautify the streets, including a campaign to educate dog-owners.  9 de Julio is now more functional for traffic and pedestrians, and has been landscaped beautifully

... May 2019, AU$1 buys around 30 pesos and going up!  Entry to Lujos milonga is 200 pesos, and other milongas 140 - 180 pesos

... La Viruta/Estrella changed its persona some years ago and now appeals to dancers interested in dancing non-traditional tango.  The standard of dancing and respect for the codigos has declined.  Many of the old milongueros have passed away, taking their example and authority with them.  Many dancers now find they can afford to attend only one milonga each week, while others have stopped attending completely

... there are many small, specialty coffee shops in the city & suburbs serving coffee to satisfy even the most demanding coffee-snob

... tango shoes are everywhere, but it's hard to beat Katrinski cushioned, hand-made to order shoes that cost around AU$150

Bob

How would you like your piropo?

Adios ángel con alas en los pies. (Farewell angel, with winged feet). Ladies, how might you feel if after dancing together, a tanguero whispered this to you? Or, De qué estrella te caíste? (Which star did you fall from?) Would you feel outrage for being objectified by a man? Or pleasure at the chivalrous attention?

A year or so ago, when the award-winning Argentine feature film El secreto de sus ojos (The secret in their eyes) was released here, an ex-patriot porteño expressed delight with several piropos (flirtatious compliments), peppered through the early part of the movie. I think that he felt a twinge of nostalgia for his home-town and the local practice of a man expressing appreciation for a woman, traditionally done in clever, poetic form. This has been described as the habit of delivering a verbal flower to the ladies that pass by … (Sergio). A crude wolf-whistle hardly has the same effect!

Call me old-fashioned, but IMHO the piropo belongs perfectly in traditional tango culture, where the woman is respected and treasured. Men are macho, but not in the sense often used by gringos. Totango’s article about male & female roles, and tango gender equality provides a revealing insight into this side of tango.

Some say that the piropo is dying out, losing its poetry and becoming more mundane. Certainly Qué ojos! (What eyes!) is less likely to enchant, than Dame de tus ojos la alegría y de tu boca dame la vida (From your eyes give me joy and from your lips give me life) Luis Alberto. Perhaps Argentine men are becoming a little too busy and too stressed nowadays to come up with witty metaphors.

On the other hand, for Valentine’s Day this year, the organisers of La Milonguita ran a competition for the best piropo. The many clever entries show that this tradition is alive and well after all, at least in Argentina!

PP

Milongueros in action

I’m delighted! At last, I’ve found a series of Youtube videos featuring milongueros of Buenos Aires doing what they love – not performing, but dancing socially in the milonga.

That’s when they’re at their best: feeling the music, dancing with real connection to their partner; dancing with and for her, and at the same time, showing the utmost consideration for dancers around them.

They keep their partner safe in their embrace, allowing her to relax and respond calmly & intuitively. You can see the look of serenity, almost meditation, on the faces of the women in these videos. Tangopilgrim hit the nail on the head, when quoting his teacher: The most important dance is the one that happens inside us.

Don’t do anything, unless you feel you have to. And do anything that you feel you have to do. (Tangopilgrim)
These milongueros and their partners are dancing in the moment. They are both being carried by the demands of the music and all its rhythmic variations, and savouring each second.

Thanks, Irene and Man Yung (video above) and Jantango , for recording and posting these gems on your sites.

PP

BsAs milonga observations

For any tanguero planning to travel to BsAs or simply interested in tango culture, we thought the following might be of interest:

• We were told that attendances at milongas were down, but that only seems to be the case at milongas relying on tourists to bolster their numbers, where the world economic crisis, swine flu and winter seem to have taken their toll. As a result some milongas have been suspended. One might also speculate whether too many tourists lacking necessary navigation skills have driven locals away from some venues. Having said that, a local said recently how impressed he was with the dancing skills of many foreigners in the last few years.
  
  
• Milongas requiring a high standard of skills such as Cachirulo, Lujos (Maipù 444), La Baldosa and Sin Rumbo are as busy as ever, despite the increase in entrance fees.
  
  
• If attending a milonga as a single, being seated in a good location (making the cabeceo easy) by the organiser, will largely depend on how frequently you go to the milonga. Regulars get seats automatically reserved in prime locations. So persistence is required to work your way up the pecking order.
  
  
• Another benefit of frequent attendance is becoming known by the other regulars. This means that more eyes will be looking your way for a dance.
  
  
• Generally it helps to attend milongas early, if you are not a regular. This gives you the chance to get a reasonable seat, the dance-floor is not yet so congested, so others can actually see that you are competent dancer and therefore worth dancing with.
  
  
• Lighting is generally much brighter than in Australian milongas. But at El Beso (Riobamba 416), the dim lighting and crowded seating add further dimensions to the cabeceo challenge. Even those of us with keen eyesight experience uncertainty. Was it me he was looking at? Can she see me looking her way?
  
  
• Waiting staff at these milongas deserve recognition, too. They are an important part of the scene. Once they get to know you, they treat you like royalty.
  
  
• El Arranque (especially on Tuesday) is a well-attended matinee milonga for locals attending as singles.
  
  
• Some traditional milongas are largely for couples and groups, such as La Baldosa, Circulo Trovador and Sin Rumbo, have a more relaxed and uncompetitive feel.
  
  
• A couple of years ago we were delighted that smoking had been banned from BsAs milongas, as well as restaurants, cafes, etc. But we were in for a rude shock, last Friday at Circulo Trovador, a very popular milonga just outside the city limits. It appears that the law only applies to the City of Bs As and not the provincia.

Anecdotes from Buenos Aires #1

Buenos Aires feels like a home away from home after 10 years of coming here, and each year brings new impressions:

• the most striking difference has been the state of the footpaths - their comparative cleanliness leaps out immediately. Less litter, and more importantly, many dog owners are cleaning up after their pets; this hasn´t followed some regulation or advertising campaign, but rather remarkably, decisions made by individuals. It´s quite a treat to walk without having eyes glued to the footpath!
  
  
• we chose this earlier time in the year to avoid the hot, humid weather that can come in by late October, and apart from a first day of 34C, it´s been mid-teens with the occasional rain; much better for getting around, and dancing, of course.
  
  
• prices are generally up, some significantly, but not all. For example, the subway has increased from 70 centavos to 90 & now 1.10 over the past 2 years; clothes & shoes are still cheap for us - even though shoes are 50% dearer than 2 years ago, our dollar is stronger by 50%; taxis are cheap; CDs the same price (around $8 -$10); food approaching Adelaide prices in some cases, with coffee between 7 and 12 pesos ($1 = 3pesos); tango lessons up by about 50% in one year.
  
  
• money: we´ve had no trouble getting 800 pesos out of ATMs now, in contrast to previous years when the limit was usually 300! And people don´t blink anymore if you hand over 100 peso to cafes & shops notes now.
  
  
• politics in Argentina changes little with regular scandals & rallies in the streets, while the government is trying to give an impression of more transparancy by opening the Casa Rosada for tours all weekend, and dedicating one room to prominent Argentine women.
  
  
• some milongas change, others remain their successful selves, but the DJs at all we have attended have been great. Entry is now 15 pesos. The afternoon milongas like El Arranque & Confiteria Ideal, which have catered for the more mature locals for a long time, are now much quieter, while Maipu 444 is full almost every night of the week with good dancers of all ages, both local & foreign. However, there was an interesting touch at Cachirulo last Saturday when Argentina played football against arch-rival Brazil. The TV was on at one end of the room, with a small group of men crowded around while the milonga carried on; even some of the dancers had their eyes on the screen as they danced past. (By the way, Brazil won 3:1, much to the dismay of the locals.) Canning on Sunday is a largely local affair, and it was shoulder-to-shoulder dancing; not much room for anything significant, but a great test of navigation while moving to the music. Sin Rumbo probably hasn´t changed much in its 40 year history, but it was busier than last year; this is a very traditional milonga that draws dancers from its local suburb - where friends meet to talk, listen, watch, and dance. Aurora Lubiz learned to dance tango here, so she was a good person to have as our companion last Friday.
  
  
• speaking of Aurora, she is now with a handsome Brazilian, Luciano, and they dance beautifully together; they also teach together both in BsAs & in Rio, so it was great to pick up lots from them during private lessons & the women´s technique classes at the Escuela Argentina del Tango.
  

Some recent BsAs milonga photos

Just loaded up some snaps taken at Buenos Aires milongas a few weeks ago.

Our very talented and renowned teacher, Aurora Lúbiz, introduced us to Sin Rumbo, a historic milonga in Villa Urquiza. Driving home in the wee hours, Aurora explained the significance of the place. This unassuming neighbourhood milonga, full of classy dancers - young and old, is where some of the great names of tango learned about the dance. At that time, there were no tango teachers as we know them. As very young dancers of other disciplines (ballet, folkloric, etc.) they would take the bus for over one hour across the BsAs metropolis to learn from locals like Julio Duplaa - an elegant dancer who has been running the Friday night milonga for around 40 years. At these informal practicas, young dancers like Aurora, Jorge Firpo, Pablo Verón, Lorena Ermocida, etc. first learned to dance tango. After the practicas they would journey home again by bus, where they would practise till the early hours and make sense of the dance which would later take over their lives & careers, and become a worldwide obsession.

It was also great to catch up our friends, Gustavo Benzecry Sabá, author of Embracing tango and María Olivera at their haunt, Salon Canning. Despite having returned that day from teaching in the USA for a couple of months, there they were at the milonga, exhausted but still dancing! They are great believers in totally improvised tango, including for their performances. This video shot at the Portland Tangofest is a perfect example. The unfortunate DJ experienced major technical problems: their selected music would not load up properly , and when it started playing, the speed was variable, so in the end, he just threw on something else. Their milonga performance brought the house down.

Dru and Roger from Adelaide experienced Club Sunderland for the first time. Yes, it is held in a brightly lit basketball stadium, but the organisers always arrange a high quality couple to perform for the crowd. But to be honest, I reckon the regulars are more interested in just dancing. Still if you are lucky, you might see the likes of Javier Rodriguez and Andrea Missé.

We were treated to a less traditional performance at La Baldosa, with Miguel and Augusto, organisers of La Marshall, the gay milonga at Maipu 444. The crowd at La Baldosa, which I would have thought was quite conservative, loved them.

Finally, a couple of shots of the gorgeous Teatro Maipó, taken after the brilliant show with the orchestra Sexteto Mayor celebrating their 35 years!

It's good to be home, but a few more weeks there would have been better.
Pat.

More on Buenos Aires milongas

Attending milongas as a single opens one to new experiences with unfamiliar partners: adjustment to the new body, style, musicality - not unlike getting to know someone in conversation, actually.

As a follower, I find that allowing myself to be at one with my partner and the music for a tanda, means I feel like a different dancer each time, expressing myself differently with every new leader. Such is the experience of the entrega. Bob's experience is not dissimilar. His partner's embrace will tell him whether certain movements are likely to be feasible, eg. an unchanging embrace will limit possibilities for turns - without diminishing the dance. After all, the enjoyment of the tanda comes primarily through the connection with one's partner and the music.

As a single, your seating at a milonga makes a difference to how easy eye contact is for the cabeceo - singles who are regulars at a milonga get prime positions, of course. At the start of a tanda if your desired partner is across the dance-floor in a busy milonga, you have to establish eye contact as early as possible, otherwise it will be near to impossible to use the cabeceo due to the crowd of dancing bodies which rapidly gathers. The exception seems to be tandas of milonga music, in which somewhat fewer dancers seem confident in the dance, or might be uncertain whether a prospective partner would handle the challenge - yes, this happens in BsAs, too!

Each milonga has its own personality, even if the venue remains the same. The venue of Maipu 444 is an excellent example, where milongas are held most nights of the week. On Tuesday evening, the milonga Sentimental y Coqueta is a traditonal, largely singles milonga, with great music and very open to visitors who can dance well. Wednesday night sees the venue hosting a gay-friendly milonga: La Marshall. Whereas Saturday night, Cachirulo, seems to be a somewhat more exclusive milonga. For more details on milongas and other tango topics, you can subscribe to the free online version of BA Tango by emailing abatango@yahoo.com with the subject line Subscribe. El Tangauta, another free monthly tango publication can be read online at www.eltangauta.com

Music may be purely Golden Age tango, or some milongas include tandas of swing, rock & roll, chacarera and even cumbia. At a couple of milongas, some tandas of tango/electronica will appear. A few milongas seem to be largely an opportunity to catch up and dance with friends who are regulars, whereas at other milongas, getting a dance as a visitor is much easier. Of course, the more frequently you dance there, the more people get to know you. We're finding that with each visit to BsAs, dancing with familiar faces means knowing which style you can slip into when you take up the embrace. On the other hand, dancing with a new partner can be quite exciting, especially when after a few moments it becomes apparent that it is going to be a memorable tanda together.

Pat & Bob (looking forward to our last week in BsAs.)

Updates on Buenos Aires

The economy - the word on everyone´s lips at the moment. Not only is our cost of living being affected by the vagaries of the world´s financial situation, but prices in Buenos Aires have also shot up since January. It´s getting expensive for us, and we marvel at how the locals might be coping.

Last night at a stunning show to celebrate the 35th anniversary of Sexteto Mayor, a tango group of international renown, the 50 peso tickets were within our reach, but most of the audience would have been locals! On a more positive note, the group did their original director and lead bandeonista - the late Jose Avellaneda - proud with brilliant renditions of many tangos, but most scintillating were the Piazzolla compositions. The two remaining original members, now elderly but sprightly violinists, brought the house down with their virtuosity. It was clear that the crowd in the intimate Teatro Maipo - a absolute jewel of an old-world theatre - did not want to let them go. Last year we were fortunate enough to catch the historic Mariano Mores show - one of the greats of the Golden Age - despite approaching 90 still playing piano and conducting like a young man!

After a week here, we´re getting the sense that the message about milonga etiquette is being understood amongst our fellow "tango tourists", or maybe it´s got something to do with the milongas we´re attending. Certainly, part of the fun of milongas is meeting up with friends and chatting, as well as watching and learning. Recently at an early milonga in Salon Canning, an older couple were an absolute treat to watch. At first glance, they didn't appear to be doing anything of great note, but then the timing, playfulness and skill quickly became obvious. They were utterly mesmerising.

And now for a word on the music played at milongas: the great DJs here never fail to surprise; not by pulling out obscure versions of tangos or lesser-known and perhaps inferior orchestras, but by their ability to mix & match great pieces into coherent tandas, played at the right time to suit the mood of the crowd and keep them dancing.

Tonight we're off to Sin Rumbo, one of the very traditional milongas in the suburbs with our teacher Aurora, and next week to Glorias Argentinas for a taste of tango of the Golden Age. Well as close as you can get to it in 2008. More to come later, but in the meantime, here's a video of the famous Dispari couple at Sin Rumbo.




Pat

Decisions, decisions ...

Heading off soon for the annual pilgrimage to Tango-Mecca and already I know that we'll be spoiled for choice with milongas. Some hard decisions will have to be made, especially around weekends. We love milongas where the traditional codes (codigos) are respected.

Should we head over to tried-and-true favourites like Club Sunderland each Saturday night? Mario Orlando, the DJ never disappoints, and the largely porteño crowd means that the floorcraft is good, despite the large number of dancers. It's primarily a milonga for couples and groups, although singles are usually seated in an area where the cabeceo is possible. Inevitably the evening will be punctuated with a couple performing - sometimes well-known hotshots, otherwise lesser-known emerging dancers.

Just a couple of streets from our "home" is Salon Canning which also hosts a nice milonga on Saturday night. The excellent parquet dance-floor is a treat and the couple who host it are delightful.

Niño Bien's lovely setting and great music are certainly attractive, but it has become so popular, it's hard to move on the dance-floor for most of the evening. El Beso on a Thursday evening is intimate - in sharp contrast to Niño Bien. Not only is it small, but it's very popular with good dancers. Ladies are seated separately to the men, unless you arrive as a couple, in which case you get seated at the back and are not considered part of the available pool of dance partners. Music and floorcraft are very good. The nice thing is that this milonga starts in the evening around 7pm. So after we've had our fill of dances for the night, we can head off to a nice restaurant for dinner before the witching hour and still have a good night's sleep!

Then there's Lo de Celia, where Dany Borelli's music is superb. It's an older crowd and the etiquette very traditional.


And the list goes on ....

Chaperones and the milonga

I recently came across an interesting historical perspective (alas, only in Spanish) on the development of some strongly held milonga codes, and it all makes absolute sense. The fact that those codes still serve very useful, but somewhat different functions today has ensured their longevity in the world of tango.

Consider the era - maybe the 30s. A young (unmarried) woman wanted to go dancing. Nice girls could only do so in Buenos Aires when chaperoned by a trusted relative. This naturally implied that any interested, young man would certainly not be permitted to join her at her table. That would have compromised her reputation. So the invitation to dance was made by the clever game of eye contact, or the cabeceo. Today, of course, it remains an unbeatable strategy for selecting dance partners, while avoiding the embarrassment of public rejection.

Ever wondered why couples don't just start dancing as soon as the music begins, and instead spend chunks of valuable dance time chatting before taking up the embrace? I guess if a young man wanted to chat up a tasty, but chaperoned chica, those brief opportunities were all he had to make a lasting impression on her. Nowadays, the social function is still served, but the chat-time also provides the opportunity to feel the music, not to mention waiting for a space to clear in the line of dance.

Why on earth have a cortina, that snippet of non-dance music separating the tandas, when the dance-floor should be cleared? Well, just imagine the gossip resulting from dancing more than one tanda consecutively with the same partner, or a single woman not returning to her own table during the cortina. That señorita's reputation would have been somewhat tarnished, to say the least. In today's traditional milongas in BsAs, this would still signify an existing or budding relationship, but dancing with a range of people is a more social activity anyway, don't you think?

See you on the dance floor,
Pat.

BsAs milongas from the woman´s perspective

Well here´s my view on how to make the most of the milonga - at least at the milongas where Bob and I choose to go in separately. Some milongas lend themselves to this, whereas others are more suited to couples.

If we were to enter and be seated together at any milonga, there would be a few implications and consequences: we would be seen as a couple, dancing only with each other and therefore usually seated in the area for couples. Eye contact across the dancefloor for the ¨cabeceo¨ is not required here, for obvious reasons, so the location in the milonga does not lend itself to meeting other potential dance partners. In fact to try to use the cabeceo from a couples table would send quite confusing messages to a local milonguero!

So when we choose to attend a milonga separately:

• We enter, pay and are seated separately in the women´s and men´s areas respectively
  
• Soon after, I visit the ladies loo and change into my dance shoes, as it´s considered bad form to change them in the milonga itself. Although I´ve seen people do it, your awareness and respect for the codes of the milonga will be noted by others if you prepare yourself for the milonga in the bathroom. Some women undergo a complete tranformation from their day-to-day persona by the time they enter the milonga
  
• I find it´s important to watch the dancers for a while, to take in the mood of the place and importantly, to identify potential dance partners. Contrary to common belief, it´s not just up to the man to select dance partners in the traditional milonga.
  
• Yes, that´s right, I am an active participant in choosing a dance partner, but I never approach a man directly and ask him to dance, or vice versa. That would be asking for a public refusal and embarassment for both parties. No, it´s all in the eyes.
  
• My cabeceo process starts with appraising potential dance partners in action, showing discreet approval as they dance past, perhaps with a smile. My body language when seated is open and shows I´m interested in dancing. Even if I´m chatting to the lady next to me, it will not be an in-depth conversation, which would close me off from eye contact with the men, unless of course, I´m not interested in dancing that tanda.
  
• Bob will ask me to dance early in the piece (via the cabeceo, of course) to show that we are both capable dancers who also respect the milonga conventions, and won´t cause embarassment to other potential partners. This includes using appropriate floorcraft, which does not interfere with other dancers: no ganchos, high boleos, long steps on a crowded floor, etc. At the end of the tanda, he accompanies me back to my table before returning to his.
  
• When a new tanda starts and I like the music, I will discreetly scan the room to see if a dance partner of my choosing is available. If our eyes meet and and the nod is exchanged, he will approach my table. At this point, I wait until he is close enough to me to be sure I wasn´t mistaken and the woman next to me was actually the one he wanted to dance with. So I don´t stand up until I´m sure, thus avoiding embarassment all round. I´ve seen some women point to themselves at this point, as if to say¨Did you mean me?¨ But I prefer the wait-and-see approach, so no one is the wiser if there was a misunderstanding.
  This discreet selection give all parties a chance to select partners according to their comfort levels without the embarassment of overt refusals.
  
• On the other hand, if I don´t feel like dancing and/or no suitable partners are available, I ensure that my body language indicates I´m not dancing at this stage, eg. by watching the couples on the dance floor, listening to the music, and definitely not seeking out eye-contact with the men seated in their area.
  
• Occasionally someone may try to ask for a dance directly, but I tend to politely refuse. Unless I am sure I will be comfortable dancing with him, I would be putting myself in a potentially embarrassing position in front of the milonga, and I would have no-one to blame but myself. And it´s true, everyone sees everything at the milonga.
  
• Oh, and I should add that presenting myself well for the milonga is important. It´s no secret that it helps to take time to dress appropriately, etc.
  
• On the other hand, when sharing a table with friends, some of these codes are relaxed, for obvious reasons.

Pat.

Making the most of BsAs milongas

It´s every foreigner´s desire to "dance with the locals", but if you´re a couple, there are some adjustments to make. Here are some tips that worked for me (& therefore, for Pat):

• we enter the milonga separately, which means that I´ll be seated at a table with other men; I also make a quick trip to the toilet to change my shoes
• I watch the dancers for a while - maybe 2 tandas - to get the feel of the milonga and to identify potential dance partners
• it´s been a good idea to dance with Pat early in the milonga, so that others can assess our ability, style, and musicality - important if my use of the cabeceo is to be successful
• the cabeceo is my only means of inviting women to dance - a direct approach can mean an embarassing refusal! In the larger milongas, I´m able to walk around a bit in order to catch the eye of a woman I wanted to dance with
• at each milonga, it takes a while to become known, and I simply have to be patient and build up my reputation in order for women to, in reality, invite me to dance via the cabeceo
• once my invitation had been accepted, it´s time to put into action some more of the codes that Gustavo Benzecry Saba wrote about in his book "La pista del abrazo". I walk around the perimeter of the dance space until I reached my partner - and only then will she stand up. This also means it´s clear to the woman that it is her that I´m approaching, and not someone near her
• after a brief "hola", my next move is crucial in givng my partner confidence in my ability to dance well with her. The embrace is a complete story in itself - and it´s a defining moment in this tanda for us
• I´ll take time to absorb the music before my first step; from here, my navigation around the floor is of immense importance. I´m dancing with the other couples around me, and it´s important to protect my partner & my space in the milonga, as well as respect the space of others
• at the first cortina, my Spanish is barely adequate for a conversation, but it´s good enough to continue the connection begun with the dance .... and at the end of the tanda, accompanying the lady back to her table is an appropriate final touch

Bob

Milongas in BsAs

Often I am asked what the milongas in Buenos Aires are really like. Apart from having lots of experienced dancers there, are the milongas so different to those here in Adelaide?
Well, where to start?

Undoubtedly the first thing that springs to mind is the harmony on la pista (the dance-floor), despite the crowds. At the good, traditional milongas you will usually sense a coherence between most of the dancers and music. You are not just dancing with your partner and the music, but also with all the other dancers on the floor. As long as dancers respect the conventions of the milonga, they are all able to dance, albeit within the confines of a square metre at times. At some milongas, popular with tourists who are unaware of these conventions, that harmony is often not so evident, so the much sought-after tango-trance is harder to achieve.

In Adelaide, perhaps we have not felt the need to develop some of these codigos (conventions), but they certainly serve a purpose, even if la pista is not crowded. For example:

• Being able to dance in la ronda (line-of-dance) and not overtaking those in front or holding up those behind, ensures a smooth and predictable flow. So dancers know how much space they have to play with.
• El cabeceo is an effective face-saving way to arrange your next dance in the next tanda. If the person doesn't maintain eye-contact or nod in return, then no harm done. Nobody is offended or put under any pressure to dance.
• Boleos and other extravagant moves which intrude on others are avoided, to avert injuries and disruption of the mood.

Take a look at some well-known examples of Buenos Aires milongas - actually not all of them were so typically crowded when the recordings were made.

By the way, Tango Salón Adelaide's first milonga will be on Friday 5 October at an elegant new venue. More details to follow.
Pat.