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Monday, 14 May 2018

Diaries of BsAs - Wardrobe malfunctions

Let's face it, most of us take the trouble to present ourselves well at a milonga.  We take care with our personal hygiene, do our hair and make-up (at least some do!), avoid strong perfumes (and other noxious food and body odours), and wear nice clothes.  Most of us want to make a good impression, don't we?

But sometimes, despite our best intentions things can go wrong...
  • Some time ago, I was about to leave the ladies' room, to return to the milonga.  Thankfully, one of the other ladies called out to me in Spanish: Tu pollera! (your skirt!)   Had she not been thoughtful enough to do that, I would have strolled into one of my favourite milongas with part of my silk skirt tucked into my underclothes!!   Now that would have made an attractive sight.

  • Not so much embarassing, but not a good look was a mature-aged gentleman in a nice suit happily dancing with his partner.  Unfortunately, he was oblivious to the fact that his suit jacket was tucked into the back of his trousers.

  • A few words of caution to ladies keen on wearing short skirts.  A while ago, a woman arrived at a milonga, obviously doing her best to present herself as a something of a vamp in both her theatrical arrival and the way she dressed.  Some men were immediately drawn by this, and invited her to dance.  However, her dress was so short, that her underwear was on display to all, when she took up the man's embrace.  Observing reactions around the milonga, she was clearly the source of comment.  It didn't take long for one of the organisers to have words with her.   Returning from the ladies room, she was wearing thick black tights.

  •  At a recent BsAs milonga, I was sitting out a tanda and watching the dancers, when something suddenly caught my attention.  It wasn't the male dancer's great skill or musicality.  I had to look again a couple of times to ensure what I was seeing was not what it seemed.  With great relief, I realised that it was only the end of his tan-coloured belt which I could see.  The last 10 centimetres or so of the belt had come adrift, and was hanging from the centre-front of his trousers.  Mercifully, the belt was soon tucked away out of sight.  Perhaps someone kindly told him.
Check your attire carefully before going out and before leaving the bathroom.



  1. Dear Patricia,

    Your accounts of wardrobe malfunction in tango are hilarious! They also make me more ALERT as to whether I am unintentionally flashing the whole milonga :-)


  2. Thanks for your comment, Irene.
    These are all true events. Who was it that said once, that facts are sometimes stranger than fiction?

    BTW, after I wrote this post, Robert told me about yet another wardrobe malfunction which he had observed - here's his account:
    "I think they were a foreign couple, she looking elegant and wearing a tight-fitting dress, to mid-thigh length, a split up the back, and stockings with a very straight seam. As they danced past, I noticed something that looked like black shorts through the split, but on the next pass, I suspected that they were black stocking tops. Next time around, this was confirmed, and, "Oh No", there's some flesh showing above them. Clearly, her skirt was riding up the more she danced. Later, to my horror, I realised, her bottom-cheeks were now showing!!! Not the best look from a woman-of-a-certain-age."


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